Will you blow on my dice?
i just smoke outta the biggest bowl i've ever seen. the kid was totally compensating for a tiny weeenie.
A stripper just got mad at me for saying goddammit. She's in no position to lecture me on morality
Drunk tip #47: Its better to overestimate how many plastic bottles itll take to urinate in, rather then underestimate.
on a scale of 1 to 'no sex' how busy are you this week?
If your relationships aren't working out because she doesn't have a penis THEN maybe you should give dudes another go
He threw up the X he took like 30min before then when we thought his antics were over... BOOM! He tried to pee out a light he was holding.
I just found my "random bang list for summer of 2012" that I wrote last night.. It's written on a Plan B receipt. If this isn't irony I don't know what is.
Want to come over and rub aloe on my tits?
I've justified worse with less. I had sex with your brother because he was wearing a nice sweater
It is not if she takes a guy home Karaoke night. It is how many.
Well, at some point in her life every girl has to decide how much weird she's willing to tolerate for hot tall banker cock
I woke up naked in this guys bed and the first thing I start saying is it's super bowl Sunday like I was yelling
I'm still depressed that I forgot my ice cream at your place
Why do I always have at least 8 men with whom I am conducting some sort of poorly planned love experiment?
Randomize
