Someone shit on the floor
cant believe you said you would bone perez hilton
i said paris hilton
thats even worse
i just heard the ice cream truck outside while mid-masturbation. i stopped and considered running outside to buy one.
I don't know how it happened, one minute we were talking about Huck Finn, the next minute I was blowing him behind the corner of his apartment building.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The higher i get, the less gay he looks, and the more i want to make out with him. This is dangerous.
we found a loaf of bread in my bathroom i believe its yours. sorry i took a shower before we noticed so it might be soggy
So..he has a girlfriend BUT she rarely writes on her wall and is only in 5 of his 371 tagged photos and her default pic is her with some other dude. It cant be serious
Oh my god you need to get off of facebook.
Hey my results were negative. Your chlamydia train stops here. Happy hunting!
I'm like a number 27.2 on a scale of 1-10 of how badly I want you right now.
Your lack of a response brings it down to a 25.4.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
Just reminding you that you are currently drunk spooning a chair saying it "loves you unconditionally". No more rum.
Growing a beard is gonna make smoking a pipe look so much more majestic
Doesn't matter if you work at a funeral home. If the boss says get a keg, you get a keg.
It's really hard to masturbate now that I live with girls who actually function before 11 am.
Only I could turn my one night stands into class essays. Go me.
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