The highlight of my Saturday night was singing along to the sound of music alone in my room.
this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
according to the contents of this bucket, last night i swallowed a whole teabag
Ohmy god im about to fuxk my TA. i thyought this was a dream but i love you. <3
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I need a picture of your dick for my friends birthday card
He used the phrase "no problemo" in a sext. It's over.
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
I walking on her passed out on her bed, clutching a burrito and the walking dead dvd on replay.
I met a bunch of Germans and said in german "this is for the fatherland" and poured a beer on my head
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
True love: he brought me a margarita while was in the shower. He's a keeper.
He started saying the pledge of allegiance so his boner would go down. Merica.
I drank so much that my feet don't feel like my feet
This is not the first time I've recognized my body is subconsciously trying to make pizza.
I just had a random tinder dude give me a ride home from school because my car is dead. Tinder rules! It's like Uber, but with boys who want to impress you.
All I could think about was how many vaginas had been on the toliet that I was pukin in
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