who let me buy 6 packs of big league chew? and eat them all? thats not cool
finally cleaned my dorm for the first time all year. bleach is awesome.
she named each of the players on the last ten madden covers in order and then shotgunned 2 beers...if she doesnt have a penis im in love
I put bits of fruit cocktail in the jello shots i made because i knew that they were gonna be the only thing we ate all day
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He came on my face. Threw a towel at me. Stole my weed. And left. I thought this would be over after we graduated?
Fuck going to see The Hunger Games tonight. The only thing I'm hungry for is some dick. Let's go to the bar.
My drug dealer just asked me to go see Les Mis on Christmas. Should I be worried this is some type of musical set-up?
No. No. No. No one's allowed to fuck in the yurt.
Goddamn it Peter ur the only person i know who can make going down on a girl a competition.
She won. Twice.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Steve, that episode of cops where your dealer rear-ended that family is on again.
Pretty sure I love my nipple piercing more than I'll love my children someday
the moment when you open a dick pic with your mom in the car... On your moms phone... Of your dad... Scarred for life
Hey, do you know the person who woke me up last night at 1 in the morning yelling and being carried through the courtyard?
That was me Mom...
Everything isn’t always sunshine & rainbows. Sometimes there’s tequila.
Nice. Make him jerk off and tape it. Send it to his woman. I also love that you had another skype date
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