We tried having a conversation with our noses.
He made sure to throw up on the Mexico side of the border while we were in line at the check point. Then finished by screaming you an have it back. You can have it all back.
And to think..we used to do everything sober...
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
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like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
I still think the kiddie pool full of jello option is worth exploring. Just sayin'.
That freshman kid successfully snuck into a college party, got caught, proceeded to jump out of a second story window without getting a scratch then met up with us a block away and somehow managed to get a bottle of grey goose in the meantime. He is truly blessed by the alcohol gods
Haha. Fifty shades ain't got shit on me. My tits look like they got in a fight.
Don't I can pass these orgasm blushes off as sunburn for much longer...
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Sushi was just eaten off my naked body. I feel like I can die in peace now.
If someone plays phil collins i'm gonna take off my clothes
He propositioned me for a threesome once so yeah I'd say he has what it takes to run for public office
I gave my girlfriend a ring to celebrate our anniversary, she thought It was an engagement ring. Now im getting married and I don't know what to do.
This woman at the blackjack table is sitting on a pile of newspaper so she can pee at her seat and never miss a hand.
I am 11 times too hungover to give the eulogy
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