Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
you turned your livingroom into a bong?
He made me pinky-promise that he gave me an orgasm.
it's fine if we fail the bar, we were never going to satisfy the moral character requirement anyway
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm going to look like a jackass in the Mexican newspaper tomorrow.
Chick last night said she only gets off if she rubs her childhood blanket her parents gave her during sex
She had sex in a public bathroom and slept on a couch in the dorm lobby. It's only Monday
And by "schedule" I meant crumbled up liquor store receipt, that I wrote shit on.
All I remember is a very aggressive two-stepper who inadvertently made me give myself a black eye with my own beer
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Forever getting my life back together in gas station bathrooms.
Dude she smelled like bar-b-que sauce. I can't think of anything better.
she's a drunken disney princess. so basically me if i had a crown and no desire for independence.
Didn't realize he fucked me in a bed a dog is always in until my face swelled two sizes and I had hives all over my body. This is God's way of punishing me for having amazing sex.
if jesus wore shoes made out of pure flavor and hurricane kicked u in the face thats how it feels to eat pizza bites right now
i opened the door and you were passed out on my doorstep wearing ugly shorts and cuddling a pinnapple, i dont know what happened to you.
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