first i yelled "you cant get it up?" and then in the middle of it i opened a Corona
that's an acceptable place to lick
...She then said get into the spirit and started making firecracker noises while having sex
i'm about to rub a glazed donut on my face just so it feels like you're here
could hear acupuncture therapist getting blown in the next room over the whale music
I'm hungover and surrounded by children and Republicans. What did I do to deserve this?
You may see me wearing your shirt to class. It's because I still have the spins and I'm anticipating throwing up on it. Asshole.
My inner buddhist recalls, "You receive the d when you aren't looking for it, only when the d wants you." True story.
If you've never been partying there before, take Shae with you. Drunk Shae is like a GPS. She found us the only bottle shop still open at four, a pot dealer, and told us all which subway to take to get home. She'd never been to Madrid before. It was awesome.
Also I'm sorry for asking you to shave my vagina for me last night
i've now hooked up with two guys who have tattoos of their sister's names...so that's a reality i have to live with...
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
Tequilla is a sneaky bitch ninja that doesn't kick in until you least expect it. Then BAM! You're peeing in unconventional places.
If you feel frisky later I have a cowboy hat that would look great on you naked...
Who is this......
I may have dislocated my hip getting fucked on the bathroom counter
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