at this rate if someone im actually interested in likes me back im going to die of surprise before i even get to make out with them
A freshman just woke up on our back pourch... He swears there was a party here last night but we didn't have one
You totally narrated your dogs thoughts for 2 and a half hours last night, and I was enthralled. I didn't say one word, I just listened.
Miss Michigan hasn't even been Miss USA for 24hrs and already stripper pole pics are surfacing. Classy.
Slurping strawberries throug a straw. It feels like the kool-aid man is coming in my mouth.
You are such a cockblock sometimes
You NEED a cockblock sometimes
I'm on the bus, watching a girl shush her balloons.
How long can I keep it classy to hook up in my old office building? Two more years? Does it get weird after 30?
What's the address and code again...does anyone need anything and why is my viking helmet on the bed?
I'm studying. And by studying I mean I am laying on my floor drinking boones farm alone. Last two weeks. Fuck it.
Idk... he wears anklets.. i dont think i can get past that.
And thank god for autocorrect cuz I can't even think in English let alone spell in it right now.
can you take a pic of your glorious tits but not send it just yet? I need motivation to finish this bull shit presentation.
It smells like graded cheese and febreze in the family room what the hell have you been up to???
I lysoled the money\n(631): wrong text lmao
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