Funny, my mom didn't get it when I said 'that's what she said' after she said 'it's so thick, it's impossible' in reference to my milkshake
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
I wasn't so much your wingman at that point as I was the interpreter of you point at shit and mumbling to the cab driver.
All I'm asking for is flower occasionally, and in return you get to come home to me naked in heels. Is that to much to ask for?
I thought i lost my bra, but when i went back to help clean it was hanging up on the wall
But you're the one who should be jamming foreign objects into my vaj instead of an old weird lady. I mean, it is your birthday....
I kind of want to throw a lot of things at him. Mostly blunt, heavy objects.
Is it possible to rally from a drunken seizure?
you told the police officer you wanted to be just like her one day but not a lesbian
my night stand is a mini fridge, dont even try to get on my level of laziness.
Thanks for putting up with my drunk friend last night. Its all fun and games till someone pukes macaroni under your fridge.
I mean of all the things to be cockblocked by, Taco Bell is pretty high on the list
Dude she smelled like bar-b-que sauce. I can't think of anything better.
My sister's exploding appendix just cock blocked me...
To be clear you just said "I'll give you a baby" as a sext?
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