did you know they have Ed Hardy school supplies at Target? it's like folders and notebooks for little douchebags in training.
A disheveled girl in front of me just looked down, shrieked, and yelled to the girl next to her "what is this" while pointing at two large white stains near the crotch of her black jeans. I love that Thursdays are weekends, it makes awesome Friday mornings
I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
I just smoked a bowl in the dining room and am now drinking a glass of chocolate milk. i can't believe i'm getting paid for this.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he bit the head off a dead goose for 5 beers. this is my future boyfriend.
just went to my meeting with last nights make up still on, not wearing a bra, and the 14 shot tallies still on my wrist.. My advisor's questions should be answered as to why I'm not in my major yet.
Well the walls are thin and I can hear the couple next door having sex. I think their dog is somehow involved.
Normal vaginal pH: 3.8 to 4.5. Of course it tastes like a 9-volt. I could run a potato clock on that thing.
You stared at the ground for like 20 minutes willing yourself to get sober
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need a fuck buddy with more available hours
It's gonna be like a sexual version of A Christmas Carol in my house in a few days.
Make me food? I don't want to be a science experiment. I'm dunk. Holy shit. Drunk*. Let's do science.
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
Stoner thoughts are the only thoughts I want to have now.
I wish I had a tail.
Why?
...why not?
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