It's a miracle Ok Typing texts toYou right now
I looooooove Saturdays!!!!!!!
I am absolutely hammered
your life is more of a joke than dina lohan.
if you\'re going to compare me please pick the classy one. Michael Lohan.
so i had sex last night with my 12th partner, but hes number 1 for my first time using a condom. i think im finally learning.
just woke up in the hotel with gummi bears all around me and someone took the tv
we took the tv and as for the gummi bears don't eat them you put em in her vagina
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Now that Steinbrenner is in heaven he's going to make Jesus cut his hair
It's pretty bad that I know he's opening his door from the way it squeaks because I have snuck out of his room so many times this semester...
My summer fucks are coming back to haunt me with a vengeance.
YES. YOU ARE GOING TO HAVE SEX WITH ME WHILE I SING LES MIS.
So I just noticed that my last drunk google search before going to bed last night was "ghosts based on gays." I have no idea what that's supposed to mean
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is there like a dick file on me? Guys can't hold two dicks anymore?! Who are you people????
Well.. If you trust a test that only costs a dollar, I'm not pregnant
I will read books by day and do guys by night. A mental and physical enlightenment, if you will.
at what point last night did i get this tattoo of an anchor made of dicks?
around eleven
My boss and I ended up at the same strip club. We both got lap dances while talking about work.
He unofficially told me he deleted his tinder because of me. I think that’s a pretty romantic gesture in 2018
Randomize