so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
I hope you get used to having plenty of sperm because you're never gonna get any.
"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
He said "what's the haps". I don't know what the haps are but there goes his chances
just gave him road head on the way home IN A SNOW STORM..good thing we didn't crash or I'd be dead. I DIDN'T HAVE MY SEATBELT ON
clearly you have your priorities straight
when she said she's going upstairs to put her "play clothes" on, I knew either she was a pervert or a kindergarten teacher. Either way, I wasn't going to leave. She's a pervert by the way.
This is just what we do. We meet guys, go back to their place, smoke all their weed & go home to compete in out own version of Cupcake Wars.
Do you know why I have a burn shaped like a tiny spork?
Sext: Bring me pancakes from the midnight breakfast gathering please
I swear, when I turn 21 in four months, I'm going to carry a flask around with me, and make a drinking game out of everything.
Let's put a bunch of beers in a backpack and shotgun them in a Red Lobster bathroom
I told him no rough stuff and he immediately bit my ass. Who the fuck does that?
I just had a dream that I was fighting Donald Trump... Gotta stop watching the news before bed
After you punched me you ran away and it took an hour to find you... On the wrong floor... Sitting alone saying "it doesnt make sense"
Last night I made out with two lesbians while dancing with another girl. I'm pretty sure it wasn't even real life.
Randomize
