Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
Just chased ups truck with a half wiped ass for you. You're making dinner tonight
I've spent the last ten minutes rubbing glue sticks on the wall
It was at that moment that I realized I was alone. Alone and drunk on an Epcot ride.
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
we have to top last new years. except im not ready for jail. that can wait a couple years
I guess I was trying to make a cheese sandwich, I had to change my sheets cuz I slept on it and the cheese melted all over me, Dave, and my bed
Oh, and also, a couple of straight girls showed up. But they ran away.
I need to establish a pattern of dominance early.... I'm like a slutty Cesar Milan
How bad would it be if I wore out the dress we got peed on in. You're the only one who knows.
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
He walked into the bar with a pineapple and they served him AND the pineapple
I need your opinion, is it ACTUALLY sweet that a booty call offered to walk me home with an umbrella because it was raining, or is that just low standards?
Come over.
Look lady I can't have sex with you EVERY day. I have things to do.
She ripped her shorts off and yelled "VAGINA TIME!"
Randomize
