I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
its freezing days like this when i seriously consider littering to speed up the global warming processes.
you are my new fav person for making him do the walk of shame in pink footie pajamas!
On the quad today: An amish choir singing something weird, and not 30 feet away 3 girls tanning topless. Definition of diversity.
I just puked in my fish tank. Helloooooo summer.
So I'm drinking wine and watching Thumbelina
I'm teaching my cat to play fetch
Yep, it's a friday
New favorite drinking game: bobbing for jello shots. Where did these freshmen come from and when can we go there?
All I could think of during that funeral was how great I look in a suit, how creepy catholics are, and how horny I am.
I'm sorry. I just realized our 'big night out' ended up being you driving my high ass to get burritos and back.
sorry like um she made me hold her puke bag while she peed in front of me is that better
Here's what I don't understand. How does anyone watch you eat mayo for 12 minutes and then ever fuck you again??
I WAS KIDDING ABOUT SLUTEMBER BUT ITS ACTUALLY HAPPENING
I can't believe you're forcing me to handle this hangover sober
also I was promised more toga parties by popular media
I can feel the shame as I walk down your hallway.. good night
Randomize