Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
if your dad confronts the dude you fucked about the background check he did on him, NOT GONNA GET A CALL BACK
i'm drinking out of my 'black like my president' mug
yo dude i was totally schwabbin last night.
what does that even mean?
you ever see those charles schwabb commercials, where the people are like half cartoon half real.... well yeah i saw that in real life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was debating whether her purse was real then I saw her puke in it.
I just peed behind the dumpster and dedicated it to you. Can i call u?
HOW DID YOU GET DEPORTED FROM THE BAHAMAS
All I wanted was a hug. You dirty, dirty whore.
I was making out with him, and then his friend randomly took off my pants and started going down on me. My first semi-threesome was a success.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How are you not embarrassed to know me. I'm a mess right now. I'm a walking, talking tornado of embarrassment
It was like a square peg in a round hole... I've never seen one shaped like a stick of butter...
I'm taking the day off so I can get drunk at Whole Foods before noon
Soooooooo high. David tried to rinse the water droplets out of the sink for 5 minutes
you've already made the comitment to pee in public you should at least whip your dick out
I woke up an hour ago with orange fingers and a condom stuck to my head.. Wtf just happened?
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