i hope S**** or M***** or someone took note of the fact that i was drinking popov like water and could no longer form sentences. i mean, dont get me wrong i had been thinking about boning R*** long before my sobriety left the picture but the number of reasons not to, outweighed the temptation and without sir robert burnett as R***'s wingman, it would have never happened
god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
Update: Discussing lingerie with my father. He likes sheer black things. Not into the colorful stuff I wear.
found a pic of my little bro & his girl naked. he got the brains and the huge junk gene. I hate him
All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
She just said, "are my livers going to die?"
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
I went to pick my brother up downtown and I stopped at a red light a homeless old man comes up knocks on the window shows me his penis and then screams money
I think that's mostly how we became friends.
Well that, and your desire to put your penis in me.
Wake up we need to beat the walk of shame rush hour
Shouldn't have fucked on the top bunk, I bounced so high my hair got caught in the ceiling fan and almost broke my neck.
SpongeBob is life. I once broke up with a guy bc he said SpongeBob was stupid.
She just took all of the blankets in the house and threw them in the yard, because 'the grass was cold'..
on a campus of 30,000 people, i should not be able to see every single guy I've ever hooked up with at one party.
Pro tip: When you spend the afternoon banging your boss, don’t meet your mother-in-law for dinner if you still smell like cum and watermelon flavored lube
Randomize
