super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
I sware she could use her own nose as a dildo.
I want Jason Statham to talk British to my vagina.
LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i got pulled over in my 'cops love me' tshirt. he didn't think it was funny when i pointed it out.
Everytime I think about NYE, my gag reflex kicks in.
no they seem fine, they're doing push ups and waiting for a charging toy helicopter
Please tell me the foreign boys in the kitchen this morning were yours.
In the ER. 2nd degree burns. Drunken attempt to make gasoline scented candles.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Today's forecast: A sex tornado warning has been issued in your area. Counties affected include your bed, your shower, or your couch. This warning is in effect until further notice. Signs of a sex tornado include: your girlfriend coming up with a huge analogy to inform you that she's ungodly horny today.
I woke up and found a stick of butter in my pocket. There's no butter in the house so I don't know who's it is. Using it to make cookies.
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
It's like wanting to be a vampire vs being a vampire. You don't know the cock lust until it's infected you.
you got to sleep with him and don't even remember it? that's like sleeping through an entire vacation
He made me chicken tenders and margaritas in preparation for me to take a pregnancy test at his place later tonight. Like...seriously.
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