Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
I am trying to think of a way to make alcohol cupcakes
I just drank til 6am then boned a 32 yr old that looks exactly like ET. Oh god.
my roommate just showed me the scar on her forehead... that she got from a shake weight... That. just. happened.
They sat me on college avenue with a puke bucket and people were mistakenly throwing change in it. Got me enough money take a cab back to my apartment.
He must have sensed I was about to trade him in...he's really stepped up his sex game
So apparently blacked out me judges a man based on what type of dinosaur he would be...
Were you drinking last night?
Because typically I don't associate the phrase 'Go sleepy time' with sobriety.
God gave me a talent besides one night stands. I feel like I should use it
Well. I hope my dad likes whatever sweater stoned me picks out.
Who says no to sex and donuts?!
I was looking for a pen and I stumbled upon my mom's vibrator. On a related note, yes I will be going out tonight.
I'm like bob the builder except I'm fixing boners.
she said she was so hungover this morning in a way that sounded like she was apologizing for thinking she was attracted to me last night...
I just want a man in my bed on a regular basis, who cuddles, and who I can also occasionally hang out with outside of my bedroom. Is that too much to ask for?
Randomize
