East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
what happens if a cat eats a birth control pill? i mean i don't care about the cat i really just don't want to get pregnant
it turns out vodka filled condoms arent that funny
He got about halfway through singing "Drift Away" before he passed out and broke my coffee table.
He seriously just asked the doctor if taking the medicine for chlamydia was going to cut into his drinking time. Never let it be said that he is not dedicated.
it's like his penis is God's way of saying "sorry about his face"
Everytime the frat boy touches his bro's ass after making a cup take a drink
I wanna throw up and cum in that order
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
I'm to the point that I've had the revelation that its physically impossible for my arms to be attached to my torso.
I love my life sometimes. I do miss being an adult, from time to time, but a little vodka always changes my mind.
Idk man, most things I eat are even better than I expected. Like when I drunkenly put mac and cheese on a slice of cheese pizza or when I soberly put mac and cheese into a Taco Bell burrito.
Now it's a thing. He's kind of a creeper and now he's lotioning me. This is going to turn into a Buffalo Bull situation.
Also, what day were you thinkin we should trip balls at the children's museum?
My saturday night consisted of sewing my Halloween costume and watching Blues Clues
You actually...sewed your costume?
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