He has some good qualities. Beneath the layers of asshole and fat.
You fell asleep mid BJ last night. I put your pants back on you. My ego is pretty bruised this morning.
She has a concussion we think. Dancing to barbie girl.
so sad. i just ate the last good 'n' plenty out of the bottom of my purse.
At what point did I eat out of your mouth?
Sandwiches are there for you when porn isn't.
mid-sex i was thinking.. these are not the right balls slapping me
On campus. Grown men in women's sexy bee costumes. Complete with legwarmers. This cannot be real life.
He should know he can't successfully wrestle in pudding fully clothed. Amateur.
Dude, you need better judgement.Trust me I know. I put my dick in the wrong mouths all the time
I'm pathetic. I'm eating cream puffs in the bath and crying a little.
HAVE BEEN SPEAKING IN RUSSIAN ACCENT FOR 5 HOURS
SHIRT GONE
Ps. I'm slapping the bag. It's an emergency.
Bacon and your penis are involved. Of course I'm going over.
Last night I made out with two lesbians while dancing with another girl. I'm pretty sure it wasn't even real life.
Randomize
