And no, shaving doesn't make it look bigger, either
I wish I was that guy from the miller light commercials so I could walk into parties and take peoples beer without getting yelled at
we are cooking lunchables pizzas on a fire pit.
He was sitting on the bathroom floor, swirling his finger in the toilet singing the Laguna Beach theme song. I don't know whether to laugh or help him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He insisted on us having sex while watching the biggest loser and asked me if I could "resist the temptation".
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
I swear the pregnant cashier was jealous when I bought my plan B
Gees I domt know what your deal was. You kept looking at Nick and shaking your head frantically and doing a weird motion with your hands
Tgat was the small dick alert
He kissed my hand AND my forehead. I don't think this virginity business is for heartless whores like us.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You've never sent a girl a dick pic?
Call me old fashioned
He managed to find a wheel chair and a super mario hat, now hes rolling around screaming "real life mario kart!"
She wore her engagement ring the whole time we fucked. I hate her fiancee, so it was cool
Update: the condoms are expired and Canadians are NOT to be trusted!
He had a small dick anyway. I'm glad I barfed on it.
I know it's super late on a work night, but can you drop by and bend me over my new motorcycle? I have tequila and tacos...
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