I think east. Tornado watch. What the fuck are you doing in Texarkana?
Bonnaroo. Tornado watch? Expand on that thought.
Watch for tornadoes.
i just witnessed two asians having sex for the first time ten feet away from me..hes having a seizure..what the duck is going on???
Wat the fuck dude ketchup in my bong???
Apparently we both projectiled on Erin at the same time.
That's some true roommate bonding right there.
Theres a freshman smoking a pipe on campus. This new class is setting a new standard we're not ready for
at the hospital. the stripper fell on his face when she was trying to grab the dollar bill out of his mouth with her ass. broken nose for sure.
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
Why are you surprised? I've only ever liked older guys since I was a 3 yr old crushing on her pediatrician.
For graduation he gave me roses, a giraffe necklace, and a butt plug. I think this might be my one shot at true love
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
Smoking a bowl in nothing but a flamingo thong.
Dude I puked in a snow bank and then fell face first into it
Btw, remind me to tell you about how I had to cancel my crazy wild sex plans with Will b/c my roommate came back from his trip after a day b/c Canada wouldn't let him in. Fucking cockblock.
Actually that's the whole story. You don't have to remind me.
We put you in the box and you started to cry, that's how high you were.
Do you remember last night?
Just that I fell down a hill with my penis out and the emt talked to me.
Randomize
