Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
a pedometer??? no beatles?Steve jobs just took a dump in CA and it landed on my heart
you know that saying beer then liquer makes you sicker, it should be beer then pickles makes you throw up alot, everywhere.
I slept face down in the dirt because I wanted to go camping?
im never drinking wine from a person in a wet suit and goggles ever again.
im drunk. people are steering their children away from me. whatever it is that you called for, I assure you that I don't care. have a good night
she left with her roommate. or at least i think she did. but i also just thought i ate candy corn but i'm hal convinced it was candle wax.
It's like god made him fantastic at oral to make up for what his mouth does the rest of the time.
The bachelorette started when I opened the door and they threw a few dozen dildos at me.
She was hiding under the bed to surprise me with sex. But when you took your hookup in my room to bang things out, she thought I was cheating on her. So explain it to her douche.
Yes. I will keep putting the beer into my stomach and eventually the bartender will make a mistake
his first fb message to me in 3 years was "is your cock open for business?" im blocking him
I don't need a lecture. I'm 41. I know I'm an idiot.
No, gay couples have the same problems straight ones do; I wish that we could go back to the days when he would shit with the door closed.
On a side note, my ex husband offered to buy me shrooms
Randomize
