I woke up on the side of the highway to the ppl in orange jumpsuits cleaning to comunity service. Not sure which freaked them out more... Finding a dead b ody or me not being dead
Life lesson #57: drinking whisky out of apples leads to threesomes.
New Jersey isn't a real state, it's just a myth you tell little kids to scare them like Canada or Carrot Top
Her birthday cake consisted of a shot of tequila with a candle in it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Giving the kids Children's Claritin and calling it candy.....Is it setting them up for drug abuse later?
How long is it safe to eat only Hot Pockets and Popsicles?
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
Just had a thought: were the sirens on when we were in the ambulance?
Honestly... isn't she a psych major? how does she go through life NOT realizing that everything she does is a cry for help?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She told me she's into girls now. I told her there would be a full bottle of jäger and an empty bed here Friday.
So you get idea of what my night was like, I woke up this morning and the back of my head was orange
So much easier to puke and rally now that my gluten's under control
we are the apple cider girls!
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
he was wearing pj pants, thank you for not letting me go home with him
It seems I've entered my 21st birthday the same way I entered this world: naked, crying and smothered in someone else's bodily fluids...
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