Where the fuck is Rob at, he hasnt answered his phone in like 2 weeks.
Dude Rob died 2 weeks ago wtf?
Holy shit r u serious? How?
Just kidding, but im pretty sure he boned your gf and doesnt want to talk to you.
In Vegas, have spent the last 48 hours wearing a viking helmet and fanny pack. I consider this to be a career high since drinking is my career
plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
I got vodka in my stocking. Having an alcoholic mom has paid off.
the first call I got in the morning was from visa fraud prevention so yeah it was one of those nights
I wish there was a classy way to show off your boobs.
Freshman just walked up and thanked me for letting him hide under my bed when the cops showed up to the house last weekend
I sent her 8 pictures of my dick in a baked potato. Not sure how I thought that would get me laid later.
That reminds me of that one time you handcuffed me to a table leg while I was reaching for the vodka.
It was an 11am booty call. We were both out of our element.
If we don't rescue him from the fat chick soon, she is going to eat him alive and suck the marrow from his bones.
So...guess who had sex tied to the ladder of a caboose under the stars in Joshua Tree? This bitch
seriously considering getting an electric blanket rather than sleeping with guys this winter for warmth.
sex on acid sucks though, i want to connect with the universe not your dick.
What does "mood AF" mean?
Mood as fuck.
Why did you comment that on a video of a gorilla throwing its own shit?
Randomize
