they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
oh man you're gonna hate me when you log onto facebook. remember i love you
Who would have guessed that on my moms birthday she'd have sex with the door open. :(
he actually said the words "do you want to pet the lizard?" with a straight face as he unzipped his pants
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thanks so much for stopping me from telling him i want to have sex with him while i proceeded to hookup with the air.
He said "I wish they sold 40's in bars".. and a business plan came to mind. Maybe I CAN do something with my degree...
She keeps sending, "show me your elephant trunk."
Still burping lighter fluid. Totally awful.
last night a police horse bit me when i was wasted. even the animal kingdom knows i'm no good
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Hey, this is Travis. I just so intelligently deduced that I am in a college dorm somewhere in western oregon. Probably WOU, based on the process of elimination.
my mom was by far the drunkest one there. best impromptu wednesday afternoon party ever
We could all 3 jump out of a cake in just tophats. A true marble cake.
What kind of gift says "I'm sorry you accidentally stuck your hands in my puke (even though you should know better by now)"?
Lube filled water balloons always make for a good time
Hey do you remember me?
You were a giant banana.... how could I forget.
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