I feel like I'm in dance class right now
I hope you shit your pants in a socially devastating situation.
It's just like the Real World with babies
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
last night i found out that about 5 of my friends audio recorded us having sex through the bedroom door, then auto tuned it in the tpain app on his iphone.
Well, both are illegal but one involves my vagina a whole lot less.
We were squawking at each other for over an hour like chickens. Literally. Never touching the stuff again and never again showing my face at that Denny's.
I don't want to get into details but it feels like there was a bear mauling involved. A very good bear mauling.
Did you guys seriously let me trade my id for a kebab last night??
You need to come back and help me drink our beer so the fridge has room for the other beers
I dont even think your gonna like what I got you for christmas. If not we can take it back and get drugs.
I achieved maximum drunk last night. It was pretty extreme. Woke up on a couch, outside, in a suit
Just an FYI i'm going to get drunk as shit while you are on duty and attempt to not fall into the bathtub again.
Rodger that.
Kick open the door, strike a pose, steal a boyfriend, end scene.
I watched my wife kick balloons while wearing thigh highs. It's not a sentence you get to use too often
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