I want to make Jon&Kate babies with him. Not in quantity, but in percentage asian.
accomplished twins. life is a go
Just dunked an oreo in a white russian. Trying to think of a better experience in my life and failing.
She gave 2 thumbs up when Nirvana came on the radio while blowing me in the bathroom
im pretty sure this vending machine only exists when im drunk
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
It feels like one of my ribs evaporated.
How does one chug a beer and swing the bottle at someone in a single motion? This guys a beer ninja man
So take that alcohol. I still win. I ALWAYS WIN. Plus i didn't have to wear clothes. DOUBLE WIN.
They are taking turns pissing on the fire. This is my life.
I know my whole body feels like I belly flopped onto concrete. Seriously need to tone it down for a while
He tried to make small talk to hide the fact that he was struggling to unhook my bra... at least he tried right?
I may have had several rum punches and then gone to the store and used European cucumbers to prove my baton twirling prowess.
That's right. I just LL Cool J'ed you up in this bitch. Zero fucks.
Don’t get me wrong—I love silver and bracelets—but handcuffs are not a good look on me…
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