That poor girl was naked and had to be at a job interview in an hour
My nephew just came out playing with my moms vibrator.
you told his mom that the only thing he wants for christmas is his dick in your mouth
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
Why hello there Olivia! How are you today on this fine and most wonderful morning full of magic and adventure and awesomeness?
Someone just got laid.
Okay. I really need to get out of this guys bed and get home. It's two in the afternoon. He's not even HERE.
Is your answer to that text seriously a right parenthesis
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
He acted like he was sleep fucking because I woke up to him screwing me in the middle of the night and he had is eyes closed and was mumbling things the whole time and wouldn't respond to me.
Is that even possible?
I called him by the wrong name to test him and he instantly stopped, rolled over and acted like he was still sleeping...I think he might break up with me tomorrow.
I haven't been that free with the boobs since I was 19. I'm putting them away for a while.
If you insist
The one guy literally flopped my boob out. Yes I insist.
Call it slutty but I take pride in being a first round draft pick booty call. And I know I was first cause he texted me at 1030a
I love you. Go after that dick
I think I may have fully transcended this spectrum of life. I can see beams of light man. Down to the photons
What
The only downside is I can't stop skipping
I'm literally trapped as the little spoon on a mattress on the floor of an unfinished basement with a professional athlete snoring in my hair
Im sorry for telling you id rather jump into traffic than date you again. I didnt mean to be so rude
Randomize
