I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
look, i may have sacrified a 20% assignment for a sprite. this is what hangovers do to me.
Getting pregnant off pre-cum is like getting high off erasers
One blow job doesn not make me gay.
Playing a game in life called "how far can I make a man travel for a booty call"
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
I didn't just get this from the chlamydia fairy.. You should probably get tested.
For the amount of money I just spent on my dogs toe, I could have fucked the entire B squad at a low end strip club.
College is a time for personal growth. Meaning it's time to start using those pickup lines on randos at dive bars.
Big girls don't cry they get day drunk
In the store looking for it now. They put the theatre/script section right next to the gay erotica section. Rude. Practical, but rude.
Dude come over...were drunk and I'm holding a T-shirt gun and discovered beer cans are the same size as rolled shirts.
My breath smells like dick and biscuits..
It was a crazy night: tears were shed, blood was spewed, and bottles were emptied.
I smell like beef jerky
That's among the sexiest things you've ever said to me.
Randomize
