So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
Hooking up with one of the deadbeat dads from Teen Mom does not qualify as banging a celebrity.
I think a 5 ft pyramid of jello shots in honor of the egyptians is in order
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
Dude, you chugged an entire bottle of tomato sauce and got us free drinks for the night. No way was I gonna stop you.
Well for starters, her tits were hairy.
Lets now bow our heads and think of girls with ex boyfriends who were great at fingering them. That's so sad.
My New Years Resolution is to get everyone to start talking like a 40 year old douchebag. From now on, you will only refer to me as Chief.
I think our prof has caught onto our drinking game. He burst into the room with a big smile on his face and yelled "essentially! Essentially! Essentially!"
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
I feel I should send an apology letter to my anesthesiologist.
Did you know that chef boy-ar-dee was a real person? I watched a show about him. the history of the ravioli is more scandalous than you would think.
Checked my bank account this morning...apparently I went to 7-11 at 4am and spent $22 on taquitos. New all time low for me.
I ate all of them. New all time low for ME.
i had to call him over, it was my last chance at getting some tonight
HE HAS A RESTRAINING ORDER AGAINST U!!!
it expires tomorrow
Just realized that I indirectly pay for sex through my cable bill
Wow. He is an expensive lay
I still have to figure out the cost per lay. It could be a financially sound investment
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