help me. he won't leave me alone. he just licked my ear and he's so drunk. get him off me. we're in the closet. help.
I know the vomits not mine cause its on my back.
Ever have a poop and think... that has no business coming out of a human? Like it looks like a sick dog's or a ferral animal's?
there is a school bus full of santas parked in front of the liquor store
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
lets make a pact to never make a pregnancy pact
I was high enough to understand and function with 'flip' while playing brick breaker
Damn. I don't think I could ever be that high.
Whatever you do to me, stop, I found yet another blonde hair in my asshole.
you know it's time to start studying when you've procrastinated to the point where you're reading your roommate's ex-boyfriend's wall posts from 2006.
new years resolution, not be in jail at midnight for 3rd year in a row.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
just peed on the 7/11 floor and casually left. Omg so drunk
i think he was starting go for a boob grab when we both realized the middle of a public tennis court wasn't the place
So I'm at that stage in my life where I am stalking my stalker just to get laid
I gather from Facebook you got drunk last night and took semi naked pictures of yourself?
wearing my old cheerleader outfit to the bar was a great way to get free drinks. i should do this more often
You kept crying and I couldnt help but laugh at you, I was really high though.
Randomize