i just passed a truck with a bumper sticker saying "i'd rather be cummin than strokin." god bless the midwest.
it never fails, everytime he manages to fuck my earrings out of my ears.
I just watched a guy pee from a second floor window onto the line of 100 people waiting to get in.
some crying dude holding an empty fifth of burnetts just showed up at our door and asked 'do i live here?'
I hate him and his pretentious your-sleeping-in-the-wet-spot look.
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
Tell me I'm the only person you know who could punch someone at the bar, get escorted out, smoke a cig with the cop who almost arrested me AND get the security guy who escorted me out to buy me drinks.
I sang "A Whole New World" while I took his virginity
That is awesome that you did that.
You just want to live out all your fuck fantasies with all these girls through me. I know your game. Well played sir.
there’s plenty of nice guys out there with good jobs and NO felonies!
Lol it's kinda hilarious. I left missing one glass... guage. I feel like Cinderella... but less classy.
We turned his nipples into a drinking game.
There's a pregnant girl taking shots of apple juice
We left Waffle House and he took off running five miles down the road saying we were "training for the Olympics." And I mean, I couldn't leave him out there like that...
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