Have u Seen that eharmony commercial where the guy goes " I don't know how I could love her anymore, but tomorrow I will'. Yeah that guy should kill himself
The only bad thing about this relationship... my forearm strength is dwindling
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
That's what I'm here for. To bitch slap you into believing in yourself.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I guess the study abroad went badly, I gave him a joint and he just smoked it and cried all the way from the airport
It's not my fault you have a job and can't get drunk on Tuesday's. Don't take your frustrations out on me!
it's a simple rule - pass out shirtless on the couch, become an airsoft target.
I'm responsible for my client's overall well-being. Which is terrifying coming from someone that can't stop masturbating and eats leftover pizza just about everyday.
So nowhere in the dress code does it forbid me from showing up to City Hall in a gorilla suit to meet the mayor.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Baruch atah adonai DAT ASS DOE
A hefty woman and I mean hefty shoved her number in my pocket at the gym without as much as a hello, winked and kept walking. Going to use your bed to defile her, don't want her to know where I live or have my neighbors see! Thanks, you're a pal!
When your grandma invites you to a sweet girls' Valentine's dinner with your mom and sister, but you have to decline because you're trying to get two dudes to rail you at once...
I'll explain later but I just had to legally commit to abstinence for the next 4 months
Uh oh. Put down the vodka cancel the clowns and get rid of the donkey
We’ve got a propane heater on our back porch if you want to come over and eat a McRib in peace
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