i just walked in on my sister drunkenly sobbing to sarah mclachlan. its time for an intervention.
didn't that happen to you last weekend?
shut up.
never trust anyone who drives a pt cruiser.... write that down
why is allison so mad at me??
me and her walked into dans and you yelled "hello my dear alli, you're looking mighty overweight today!".
crap..
she passed on me to fuck the foreign guy. is there a manlier, slightly less gay way of saying "always the bridesmaid, never the bride"?
nope.
i know and i thought i was only capable of loving dick and drugs, im so happy
He sent me a picture of him bent over showing his asshole with the caption "vwahla".... No more tequila for either of you
Monday morning margarita madness at ny house. Yes before wheel of fortune. Yes day drinking.
They actually said and I quote "it definitely looks like your knees went through some over usage"
theres chocolate ground into my couch, nerds candy all over the floor and cocaine on every surface. great memorial day weekend and yours?
Novelty of the week: Getting my lipstick back in an evidence bag
He called me twice and texted me at 3am. Guess absence makes the dick grow harder.
I just wanna be able to fart and do my homework but he won't leave
how much do I hate his dog? was just googling to see if you can rent a hungry eagle for the weekend hate.
I dunno what to tell you sport. Short of having a shock collar on, you're gonna wanna hook up with people.
Started dabbing in blow again because he always hated that I did it. Yuh I’m doing drugs but at least I’m doing me?
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