me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
A cab driver remembered me by name, address, and ex fuck buddys nick name from a year ago. I mustve been one memorable shit show.
Found her in the closet eating mayo out of the jar with a knife
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It seems to me that once you begin comparing Jesus to hercules and calling him a super pimp you should put the wine away...
Swallowing. Like you said. Lions. Always.
All I need right now is some mouthwash, dignity, and security camera footage...
These days, you and me are swimming in dicks.
Marco
Polo
You are going to come home to a suitcase in the fridge. Just go with it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I know you're on a date and I should leave you alone but about twenty minutes ago I realized I haven't been spanked in years so if you're still looking for a birthday present, you know, consider it.
And as the acid sets in, he looks back at the shallow form he used to call his and whispers "3 pee pees strong"
So I've decided that blue balls for lesbians is rainbow balls and the struggle is real
Bank just called....we left my debit card in the ATM last night.
It involves me, my best friend, and a stripper and her mother.
He fucks strippers and doesn’t have a life plan. Of course I’m going to regret this
Randomize