Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
who are you and why are you in my phone as dr. seuss
I'll be waiting for you under the stairs with peanut butter and tequila ... Don't tell the neighbors
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
i turned my shower on this morning and passionfruit pulp came out. how did you even do that?
Bro she gave me the stare. It's like she boned me with her eyes. I'm going in.
Slept with my first Irish dude before I even got off the plane. Dublin has no idea what I have in store for it.
I was just laughing and almost crying after I orgasmed, and then almost crying because I was laughing so hard. That's new.
Does he think you're psycho?
Officially...... yes.
.......The other day I peed on him in the shower....he was trying to touch my boobs and I wanted my space.
Turns out I hooked up with a chick who has lupus. I don't know if that's a bucket list thing or not, but it's now on mine. Check.
Moral of the story: I had sex to Back to the Future last night.
i know it looks like there's pee in the mayo jar in the fridge but i promise it's just apple juice that wouldn't fit in the jug after i added the booze.
Ok maybe now I get why I'm single I think I just broke a rib pooping
So my family just woke up on Easter morning and shared a bowl. That's bonding😊
I woke up this morning and had to retrieve my clothes from the flagpole, they were using my boxers as a makeshift rally flag for drinking. Yeah last night was a success.
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