he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
awesome recipe for disaster- bar hopping at the airport
And then i made him answer questions about me before i took off my clothes
you threatened to puke on the table cause they didnt serve eggs Benedict
I got kicked out of a mexican restaurant last night for being too drunk. This is getting dangerously close to rock bottom
I promise not to drug you or anything. Please come to my birthday party.
Plus I'm on the toilet and I can only describe it as if someone had kicked the cap off of a fire hydrant.
We decided it was acceptable to walk out of class on a quest for Doritos. That high.
Is he gonna be my crazy ex? Cause we weren't even together for as long as my weeklong bicurious lesbian relationship.
It was literally 8 o'clock in the morning. His horniness knows no bounds.
I just remembered that last night I seriously contemplated swallowing the cap to my toothpaste
she just kept pointing at the cows and calling them field penguins
Did I turn a man straight...??
Yes!
dude, there is no doorman in your lobby and the front door is locked
oh yeah, sorry he's up here at the party. coming now
Randomize
