May have just accidentally purchased an iphone on Kate's credit card. This has potential to be bad.
Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
She just used a chaser for red wine.
The most interesting things happen to you when your pants come down. I truly envy you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The theme is smores and alcohol. Dress appropriately.
He took a banana and in front of everyone showed her how he wanted it done.
ive decided something. ive accepted you as being gay. but i havent accepted you as a vegetarian yet.
Just did a relay race involving shotgunning beers, cannonballs and riding a blowup whale. Never want to leave vacation.
Circle jerk is a real thing. It looks like five innocent virgins in a closet at my brother's bar mitzvah. Yeah, I walked in on that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you realize half our text conversations are you asking me for tit pics and me saying no?
Why do all the Father's Day cards talk about what a great dad they are? Why can't there be one that says something like "Thanks for sticking it to mom and making me possible, your sperm was appreciated."
Instead of asking him how many women he's slept with I just got straight to the point and asked how many Plan B pills he's purchased
And I hope you're not misinterpreting us fucking as me trying to win you back. The sex is good and girls have needs.
There is an episode of "how it's made" on tv right now. The subject is tequila and water beds. Basically my life.
Do not let Mike show you his naughty Santa Claus outfit. It's a super long beard and crotchless pants.
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