Last night I apparently send my boss a picutre of my boobs. On the bonus part I got a raise today. So I just want to thank your parents for naming you Jeff cuz if I was not so hammered last night I would have sent it to the right one.
Todays lesson: Chew your food better when your drunk. I almost choked throwing up this morning.
My roommate found me crawling down the hallway as she was on her way to her morning class. Its time for a new semester.
We woke up, fucked, and shared a piece of my sister's first communion cake for breakfast.
And you thought you were going to hell last weekend.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
why does the wii remote smell like your vag?
We left an ass print on the piano.
i just woke up to a text from him apologizing for making me eat a full lemon
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
I can dry shave vagina like a champ
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I opened my eyes this morning, looked at the sunlight and made this hangover my bitch.
He was basically a horny puppy - following me around all night and kept sticking his hand down my pants.
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...
So how often do you needs to see my tits today then?
Just showered and cleaned every bit of sex off of me cuz i have a feelin my stepmom has jesus powers and would be able to smell it on me
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