i havee beer in my backseat and a glow in the dark condom in my cleaveage.
you're going for the gold here.
well i just puked at a family gathering so i can cross that off the bucket list
dude i'm inner monologue high
you know you were refereeing rock paper scissors for who got to make out with your sister right?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
no. i just ate a whole thing of hot dogs. me and regret are sleepng alone tonigh.
You know why I moved here? No public intoxication law. A cop just helped me from my bent over vomit pose, asked if I was ok, and gave me a ride home.
whiskey dick. though we did manage to break my closet door and flood the bathroom.
I was batman and I saved her. Then we had sex on a rooftop.
My first sex dream, I blew myself. Yours definitely wins.
We need to go to the store an get depends. I really don't want to be bothered with the bathroom this weekend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I lost a shoe at the club last night, I think that's when I decided to go home.
You sat on me. Like I was a toilet. While I was on the toilet. You peed a little.
To be clear you just said "I'll give you a baby" as a sext?
Just puked in front of a high school tour group. Based on the standing ovation, we have a solid group of freshman coming in this fall.
Yeah I knew you'd like him. He's emotionally and physically self destructive.
We would have so much to talk about!
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
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