Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
All time low... just gave a strip tease to the theme song from Law&Order SVU.
You don't think I'm weird or immature right?
No I think it's cute we had sex on your Bob the Builder sheets
This chick just checked into her walk of shame on Foursquare... I think I'm in love.
Just ordered an appetizer sampler to distract the fat chicks so we can escape
thank you for letting me use your house as a brothel.
The cops just showed up and arrested her. It's our 2nd date. Do I have to hang out her with her 3 kids until she makes bail or can I leave?
Nothing like waking up naked and alone on your floor to remind you that you make life mistakes often.
Well watching will be involved...it'll just most likely be of me licking your penis instead of me trying to understand how Hans Solo goes up against the Galactic Empire...
She jumped on a table and took off her shirt and started yelling things that no one understood. For being 3, she has a dead on impression of a drunk party girl.
& I just realized there is no vomit smiley. There needs to be a vomit smiley
I don't care how hot he is. I will not strip for him to country music.
We talked about breaking up, had sex, and in the middle of said sex, talked more about breaking up- best sad day ever
I threw up in my 8 AM. Morale is low.
You ripped the leaves off the top of a pineapple then rubbed the rough skin part all over your face saying "this is how you mate with other species"
Randomize
