never have i ever had a craving for dick this badly
You screamed 'pound me, you big thick stud.' I looked around for porn cameras.
Shut up. I did not.
I really wish I was making that up.
Either your mom needs to stop making spagetti or we need to lay off the anal. I cant tell you how much im in pain.
Spagetti cuz im not giving up the other one.
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
THE MIME IS MIMING TO BUST A MOVE KARAOKE. ALL MIME-RELATED EVENTS DESERVE CAPS LOCK
At what point does "I'm too high to deal with you right now" stop being rude?
Watermelon juice. Makes everything better. Gin. Wine. EVERYTHING.
I was trying to fart in my sleep in the hopes that he would leave
Got head at the top of a water slide over-looking the valley while wearing a sombrero and drinking a corona. Epic.
So apparently I was a completely different person lastnight, one who drinks scotch and makes out with 55 year old men who look like inspector gadget
My next goal in this relationship is to teach my boyfriend that there are valid reasons to be fear of dolphins completely.
I know it's wrong but I'm human. Now get over here, tie me up, feed me pizza and Fuck the crazy out of me. Please.
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
probably because i sent a bunch of guys a snap saying happy one year to my nipple piercings
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