I did the walk of shame to another booty call
I don't think that should turn me on, but it does
I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
What's the name of that girl you hooked up with? The one that looks like the fire hose sign.
You would think that an uncircumcised man would understand how the hood of a clit works.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my mom told me that she didn't count me in the census because im a waste of life anyway.
There's a stripper banging on the door demanding to see you.
Fucking finally I'm about to die from sobriety over here
Wondering when "babysitting" formed into "sleeping on the couch for five hours nursing a hangover and giving the kids Nyquil."
You peed on someone's house because they had a Wisconsin flag.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Trust me. Drunk Scrabble is not a good idea. Arguments over the legitimacy of the word "Pickle" break out, things are said, friendships are ruined. It's ugly.
I knew he was a classy dude because when I told him my name was Jen he said "Gin? Like Gin & Juice?"
They found me wandering around campus screaming body shots over and over again wrapped in a curtain
My cat took a shit on the guy who passed out in the bathtub
How are they?
Amazing! These new boobs are going to break blouse buttons and wedding vows!
I a very close black and white picture of my slightly erect penis and I blew it up put it in an art gallery for a show coming up and somebody bought it for 30 Grand!!!
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