i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
I woke up this morning under my fitted sheet and my legs through the sleeves of my sweater.
By the way, her vagina was so tight i was worried that i would be stuck forever
His apartment number was 69. I had to.
Who would we be if we didn't go out to drink during finals week? NOBODY
oh dear god, that would be like watching to female walruses mate. We need to stop going to that lesbian bar...
I'm just crazy horny about you
In case you're wondering where my head is at right now, it's wishing that I was getting laid and not having a debate about cheese.
For not really liking Christmas, I have an astounding amount of holiday-themed lingerie
I don't know. I wanna do you but I also want a cheeseburger.
You tried to wave to Meg on Family Guy and got upset because she wasn't waving back
If anything I look like a soccor mom going out for her annual ladies night. Trying hard, but not quite in her twenty's anymore.
I just puke and rallied at my anniversary dinner #winning
DO NOT LET HIM TAKE CONTROL OVER YOUR BOWELS
I just split a tacobell party box with my boss. 12 tacos. We were equals for a moment.
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