bought some hannah montana deodorant. hope it doesnt make me smell untalented
I would just watch. I wouldn't even have a boner cuz I would do so much coke. It would just be funny.
I was basically shocked at how calmly you accepted my violently shoving a french fry in your mouth.
Cause its not a drunken adventure unless someone ends up in a pool
Hooked up with a guy solely because he had a chameleon. Priorities.
I need a thor helmet and I need to find my heavy duty drinking mug
I just added a bunch of arbitrary options to my ouija board. Ghosts can now tell me "cheddar," "the homosexual agenda," "the whole foods vegan aisle," or "viable offspring"
No celebraish? But today's the day that Jesus, Bruce Springsteen, and a flock of bald eagles came down from the heavens in fighter jets with electric guitars and M-16s a blazon, saying "Hey America, fuck the Red Coats, it's time to party"
why are there 3 differently sized panties on our kitchen counter?
And you were like wow I love water shots they taste so good
No, I found out he was gay when I walked in on him blowing the guy from the dorm room next to ours.
i doubt you are even in possession of a crowbar.
I suggest you not find out the hard way
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
I can't believe I slept with a girl who has the words shucks in her vocabulary. I'm getting less picky by the day..
In the words of Disney’s Jafar, “desperate times call for desperate measures.”
Randomize
