Did your girl go home? Did she have fun? Can we have our friend back?
Goodnight sugar queer
Sugar queer??
Why does my predictive text prioritize 'queer' over 'puffs'?
yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
I used to practice getting hit by cars.
Escorted a stripper to her car last night,and all I got was a "Thanks" and "Go Steelers."
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
6 tequila shots, 3 kamikazes and 1 rumplemintz.. The next day I puked in my office trash can while doing payroll. I may have to dock my own pay for lack of class.
See! Theres potential!
Oh yeah. All good relationships start with a threesome.
There is an alarming amount of food in my bra.
Stripping out of my teacher clothes to Talk Dirty to Me. Who let me become a teacher?
How bad was it?
Stopped drinking Sunday, hungover on Tuesday bad.
You were on the train yelling, "THIS TRAIN NEEDS TO GO FASTER SO I CAN GO HAVE SEX WITH MY BOYFRIEND!!!"
I touched a dick in church today
We go out and drink, fuck, and I stay the night. He agrees to it because he knows I'll hook him up to IV fluids in the morning. Everyone wins
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
Randomize
