everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
So I was watching the View and they were saying oral sex is the new goodnight kiss
So when are we having a sleepover?
Isn't the perk of being in a relationship not having to put in effort for sex?
I'm gonna stay in bed all day and watch porn in an attempt to stay warm.
I had a dream last night that I had sex with Abe Lincoln. I must stop watching the History Channel before I go to bed.
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
My gym is having a pizza and beer party. God im starting to love this place.
It was like riding a jackhammer on a train during an earthquake. THAT amazing.
Caught in the act of lying. Lipstick literally all over his dick. He tried to make some story about darkwing duck or some shit but failed to realize he is a complete moron.
Well, my breasts are swollen and I cried about the Iditarod. But I say PMS until proven pregnant.
I like how our relationship transcends the borders of inappropriateness and encompasses all the colors of the inappropriate rainbow.
In other news, last night I told somebody they made eczema look so good they should call it sexzema.
You HAVE to stop telling me about the shit you do drunk. I can't be both your brother AND your gay friend.
I JUST LIKE FLANNEL, NOT VAGINAS! OK?
I'll be wearing lingerie and holding a bottle of bourbon so pick up whatever food you think goes with that
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