Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
Nothing commands respect in a meeting like Jack Daniels on the breath. You're fine.
I slept walked to the toilet and woke up pooping. Easily one of the most disorienting events of my life.
I need to stop coming to work sober
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
Im watching hello kitty on qvc debating if its a good idea to cook bagel bites on my space heater
Farmville is her only friend.
You were in the garage half naked counting your ribs and talking about how you had too many
Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
I love you and want you to know that you're the best friend ever and me lassoing you with a seatbelt was out of sheer affection.
You need to get over here. I think the drunks are about to sacrifice a chicken to the beer gods. Or a freshman. Stay tuned.
I don't know, I kept pretending that I was riding an elephant during. It was actually really fun, but you can't tell him that!
We'll never be able to grow apart now. You can't look at a stranger & say "Yea I ate goldfish crackers off his dick." & just be casual about that.
mother daughter bonding time. she's helping me make jello shots.
I just thought you should know that you should be proud of your dick. It's pretty much perfect. Just, ya know, by the way.
Randomize
