What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
so hey instead of everyone buying me a birthday present can everyone just pitch in for my abortion?
I want a gay best friend. or apple sauce either one is fine with me
I had my own version of the Hangover last night. I woke up to a disassembled Christmas tree, shit on the futon, and a hamster in the bathroom with a necklace on that said "Feed Me Bitch." I don't own a hamster. I don't know what I drank last night, but I want to do it again.
Don't remember much from last night, but I recall slipping you the tounge. For that I apologize
Anyways, i'm off to play with a rubber dick and a ouija board with two other girls...
Do you think he woke up this morning, looked at you, and then regretted everything?
All I remember is apologizing to his sister for being a bad influence while I was throwing up into a big gulp cup.
Wait, just ask him if can you can join in. You haven't lived until you've taken part in a threesome with your father...or so I've heard
Go forth my little lesbian, get your gayme on
I mean, I already put pants on today. We're already halfway there
mom how many of the songs from my childhood are mexican drinking songs?
all of them.
Nothing much. Just taking shots of tequila before I go get a bikkini wax. You?
I just bought a slurpee and condoms. God bless America.
You can help me! We'll make an occasion of it. Have some rum, make some smores, condemn the email system to the pits of hell...
Randomize