ugh, i have officially sinned in all of my cute clothes. i can't even wear any of them without feeling regret.
so then we both started to do the walk of shame and she didnt realize we had fucked in her apartment until some lady said hi to her in the elevator
you didnt stop her?
too entertaining
I negotiated the purchase of an entire tray of like 50 jello shots for $8.
After the VIP Latina experience at the strip club last night, I am rooting for Mexico in this years World Cup.
im kinda looking forward to winter break. ive been away from home for so long i think i can trick my vagina into thinking that these arent the same people ive been hooking up with since high school...
Ps. The strap-on in the pic i sent you last night was not mine. Just wanted to clear that up.
Talk me down man. Writing a paper drunk and about to buy Celine Dion's greatest hits.
I wonder if her husband knows I have my own drawer at the apartment
You can't spell "party" without "RA."
You know what else you can't spell it without? "Gonna get fired."
I want your cock.
All we are is dust in the wiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnd
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
Fun fact: the guy I banged last night. His middle name on his birth certificate is "Windstorm."
And then you poured the rest of the vodka into salsa and added the alcohol soaked pineapples and grapes and said "don't touch my salsa breakfast".
I just put on my bra while peeing. I fear this will be my big achievement of the day.
Idk she seemed really innocent until she snorted that line of vicodin
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