This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
roommate just walked in on us. two and a half times. the half, she just knocked, sighed, and walked away.
Im eating ham and mustard naked, watching south park, but its totally cool cuz the paper plate is covering my nuts
just wokeup with my ethics textbook on my chest, animal crakers in my mouth and my dick in my hand. even aristotle doesn't have a theory for this one
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You know you have a great job when you need a DD home from work at 6pm.
It's like my ice maker knows when I wanna get drunk
she smells like cat throw up and cupcakes. i'm trying to focus on the cupcakes but it's really. hard.
could hear acupuncture therapist getting blown in the next room over the whale music
You were screaming across the bar "BUYING US SHOTS ISN'T GOING TO MAKE US STRAIGHT, YA KNOW!!!!!!!!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just saw a commercial for God of War and heard the nickname he gave my vagina.
I'm not drunk because I think my blood just is alcohol from last night so being drunk is sober. If that makes sense
Dude it's sisterhood of the traveling wine glasses here
Hun, it's always cinco de Drinko in our family. It's like Groundhog Day. Only with more booze.
The problem with drugs is that there's none in this hotel
The problem with drugs is that showing my boobs only gets so much of them
He literally stole all the change that was on my floor and ran away while I was peeing. I have to rethink my standards.
Well I hate to admit it but at this point I can successfully say i have been pee'd on by both of my roommates.
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